tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2922629581452498318.post5176823615079402800..comments2010-07-30T14:40:41.404-04:00Comments on Bob's Head: Beauty and TruthRobert C Romanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13955223936635159755noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2922629581452498318.post-12178905093428934942009-06-27T07:51:44.350-04:002009-06-27T07:51:44.350-04:00It's not so much that cosmetics or dress are i...It's not so much that cosmetics or dress are inappropriate - but that there's a certain skill set in applying them to best advantage.<br /><br />Cosmetics are simply meant to highlight assets or downplay flaws. Application of cosmetics reflect the personality - what does a person highlight or downplay and what do they perceive as enough in either instance? Heck, cosmetics tell me a lot about a peron's personality on meeting.<br /><br />The skill comes in during execution. Some people don't quite get the result they were shooting for when they tried to apply, but they can develop the skill set over time. <br /><br />In regards to confidence, supported sometimes by efforts towards appearance, I agree that a woman who is happy with her appearance holds herself with better carriage...increasing level of attractiveness.<br /><br />I also think there will always be a lack of confidence amongst people in general, and thus a market for the things that help enhance appearance. It's what can be commercially provided to action a change, whereas inner confidence is pretty much an internal effort established by the individual regardless of what tools they use to build it.prajantrhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01351270272358801213noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2922629581452498318.post-31547408919582439462009-06-20T23:43:51.175-04:002009-06-20T23:43:51.175-04:00To riff on that last paragraph;
The mind, both ma...To riff on that last paragraph;<br /><br />The mind, both male and female, is created by the interaction of biological components. At that level, everyone is looking for the same thing, but that's a pretty deep level. On a surface level, everyone looks for different sets of cues that indicate those deeper things. Really, those deeper things are abstract enough that there is a certain level of personalization even before the surface cue level is reached.<br /><br />However, whether or not the male or female mind is mysterious or not wasn't really my point, nor was recognizing the rituals used by both genders to boost confidence before courtship. Actually, that was where I agreed with Castlemom, and with you. If what a man or woman does to prep for courtship actually improves their confidence, it makes them more attractive.<br /><br />My point, and I'll admit that I meandered a bit, was that modern societies' confidence building rituals have gone awry. Women wind up spending so much time focusing on flaws that they wind up destroying strengths in an effort to cover up flaws. Men, who have some biological edges in the area of confidence (testosterone; natures bottled weapons grade ignorance), wind up pushing too far into the area of being cocksure bullies rather than self-confident suitors.<br /><br />I suppose part of the problem is that there's no profit in actually finding a solution, whether it be psychological, chemical, or material. There is enormous money to be made in marketing supposed solutions that actually make the problem worse. Hence the massive ad campaigns for inappropriate makeup and dress for women, and liquid confidence for men.Robert C Romanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13955223936635159755noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2922629581452498318.post-40452408585401345802009-06-20T15:07:26.596-04:002009-06-20T15:07:26.596-04:00Hmm. Would you like a woman's point of view?
...Hmm. Would you like a woman's point of view?<br /><br />Confidence HAS been proven to improve the attractiveness of both men and women. In order for ME to feel attractive I do certain things that boost MY self esteem, thus boosting my confidence. When that confidence is boosted, I carry myself differently, which in turn elongates that whole bust/waist/hip ratio thingie Cleese talked about. <br /><br />What is attractive to me is not what is attractive to you. Someone may LOOK perfect. Their proportions pleasing, their conformation visually stimulating. But if they are hunched over, quiet, unwilling to talk, their attractiveness is diminshed. <br /><br />If your spouse was anyone but the strong, confident woman she is you would not have been attracted to her. Her form and face are pleasing, yes, but if she'd been simpering, or foolish, you would have either had fun with her for a little bit and walked away or simply walked away. Don't discount a woman's confidence in her attractiveness.<br /><br />So when a woman "hides her flaws" to make herself beautiful, THAT is what we're doing. Whether or not the male of the species can see these "flaws", to us they are real and can be stumbling blocks to that confidence that ultimately lands us our "mates". It's no different from the peacock fanning his feathers in the best way he knows how to attract a peahen. We paint and poke and constrain ourselves until we show off our best plummage, thus gaining confidence in ourselves, which makes us appear strong and sexy.<br /><br />In this instance, I'm sorry. I have to side with Castle's mom. This isn't something a man can truly understand. You can spout biology and physiology and hormones. What you can't do is get inside the female mind and understand the psychology of what makes us feel beautiful TO OURSELVES. I can throw my hair in a ponytail, wear ratty jeans, no makeup, and Dusty will want me. I, however, feel crappy dressed that way. A sundress, makeup, and curled hair, and I feel beautiful.<br /><br />Trust me. This is about us, not you.Dana Marie Bellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12658055694533650313noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2922629581452498318.post-9642984505107517732009-06-20T14:30:49.222-04:002009-06-20T14:30:49.222-04:00I agree, Castle's mom is a flake of the first ...I agree, Castle's mom is a flake of the first order. The fact that the writers put that particular gem in her mouth may indicate they have similar opinions to my own regarding the viewpoint she's championing. However, I've seen too many women who really are on a quest for 'the thing' that will make them attractive, whether that thing is an outfit, an accessory, a weight, or a significant other, and too few who look at the search as something to be discouraged in favor of real self-discovery or self-improvement.Robert C Romanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13955223936635159755noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2922629581452498318.post-29471811891394458652009-06-20T12:02:55.904-04:002009-06-20T12:02:55.904-04:00I'd like to point out that Castle's mom ha...I'd like to point out that Castle's mom has been described variously as crazy, a bad mother, unreliable, "eccentric", etc. The attitudes and beliefs espoused by Castle's Mother are not necessarily those of the show, the other characters, or even most of the general public.Dustyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01947455116885071304noreply@blogger.com